How Is TGX+ Silence Impacting Your Organization?

Have you ever called a customer service rep and had them not believe you were who you said you were?

This week, I had that experience when calling an organization that I’m a client of.

I was calling about an account issue that I was experiencing (you know, one of those issues that has you completely pulling out your hair!!).

I called their customer service helpline, and when I got connected with a customer service representative, I had an experience that I was not expecting.

———

The representative asked for my name and identifying information for my account. Initially, I had lowered the pitch of my voice (something I do from time to time to avoid being called “ma’am”), though this attempt was unsuccessful as the rep immediately started referring to me as “ma’am.” 

The representative then asked to whom they were speaking and I once again verified, “This is Rex.”  

This next part, I was not expecting…

“…you’re Rex?” the representative said in a confused tone.

“Yes, I’m Rex. I’m the account owner.”

The representative was initially silent and then continued in a suspicious tone, “Ohhh kay… I’m going to need you to verify some additional information for me.”

While verifying account information is often standard procedure, I’ve called this institution many times before, and with other representatives, I’ve never had to answer these additional questions to verify my account or identity (remember, I had already gone through their typical verification process at the beginning of the call).  

I answered the questions and the representative once again spoke to me with a condescending and suspicious tone, “Well, I guess you have all the right answers. Why are you calling today?”

———

Now, some of you might ask, “Why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you correct the rep?” 

And to be honest, it was difficult for me to immediately process what was happening. I was calling for something that was taking up a lot of my time and mental capacity, so I just wanted to get the phone call completed with the least amount of confrontation possible.

But once we got off the phone, it all hit me. It was clear the rep didn’t believe who I was just based on the tone and pitch of my voice.  

It’s interesting…

I don’t typically experience voice dysphoria. However, being continually misgendered and mistreated because of the tone of my voice leads me to feel invalidated, frustrated, and disempowered.

It leads me to moments where I’d rather not use my voice because when I’m silent, I’m less likely to be misgendered or have people assume that my name doesn’t match how they perceive me.

This is something that folks in the TGX+ community often experience. 

A disconnect between how TGX+ folks experience themselves and their voice, and how others treat them because of their assumptions of what their voice “should” sound like.

This is one of the reasons why understanding the nuances of TGX+ voice empowerment is a critical part of TGX+ inclusion work.  

We must consider…

• What is the impact when the TGX+ employees and leaders in our organizations don’t feel empowered to use their own voices? 

• What effect does this have on which voices are being heard within an organization, and which remain silent?

Do you have a question about how to give voice to your TGX+ employees and customers? Join our monthly TGX+ Inclusion Roundtable for HR, DEI, and ERG leaders. You can register here!